Day 6

To say the least, I did not find out the results 20 minutes after my last post, like planned. Yesterday wasn't so terrible. I've been so blessed this week with such wonderful family. My family has been over every single day, and my three life long best friends came to see me. Angela & Joey visited on thursday, and they brought me bubbles, twix, and cookie dough. Is there anything better than God, great friends, family, and bubbles/twix/cookie dough? Ah, my heart is so happy. Last night I called my other life long best friend Chloe Anna, and though I had been putting off the news, I just told her everything. She lives in Tampa, and drove down the next morning to see me. We spent the entire day just hanging out, eating Mimi's cafe, talking about her sweet mama, enjoying Jeremiah's Ice deliciousness, and played a game I found that I was TERRIBLE at, with her beautiful family. I got the call from Dr.Reynolds today around 12. He told me they were positive that It was Hodgkin's Lymphoma disease, and that the cancer was a stage 2A. We had hoped for stage 1, but thank you Jesus that It was not worse. This upcoming week will be over-loaded with appointments, because the cancer specialist told me that I will without a doubt need bone-marrow, and a PET scan. Other than that, the Chemotherapy would be the next step. They will be sticking a port under my skin, so they don't have to re-enter every single time i go in for treatments. We will find out other details this upcoming week when I go back to see the specialist, but I will hopefully only be going in for chemotherapy twice a month(that's what the doctor hoped for at least). The type of cancer I have has an 85% cure rate, meaning it has high chances of never coming back, and I am praying & hoping for miracles in my life! This is going to be one rough journey, but God has allowed it all to happen for a reason. I hope to glorify him throughout it all. I will continue to update my blog as the process goes on, but for now I'm going to enjoy the beautiful weekend God has blessed me with. Tomorrow my husband and I will be enjoying Gods WONDERFUL creation at the beach, and then on monday we will be at Disney, the happiest place on earth. I'm not scared, but terribly nervous for all that is about to come. Please keep Jake and I in your prayers, and also all of my family & close friends who will be there for me, watching, and being put through the process with me. God is in control, and that means there is so much hope and possibilities! Thank you for taking the time to be apart of my life in reading this, praying for us, and just being there in general. I am blessed, and love you all so much.

With Love,
    Brittany Mae <3

Day 5

I've been putting off blogging, because I've been hoping that after my biopsy it would come back as some odd reaction, and be 0% cancer.. Therefore I would just delete this blog and explain in a brief note. Well, here I am typing to a large box with quite a few words to say, but not having any idea of how to say them. I believe I left off on tuesday night.. On wednesday morning I went for the biopsy on my neck as planned, and expected It to be something easy, and really just a piece of cake. I was absolutely wrong. Our appt. was for 11am, and I finally got in around 12:30. They put an IV in me(This is starting to be a routine thing I'm noticing), and then finally knocked me out with anesthesia shortly after. I recall waving like a weirdo to this nice Jamaican man in the surgery room before the operation, and rambling about cancer, but after that I was out like a light. I woke up an hour or so later with stitches(steri-strips) on my neck, and the lump I'd been sporting for 2 months now was finally gone. A short 30 minutes later the surgeon called Jake, and told him he was almost positive It was Hodgkin's Lymphoma-- Cancer. We had been told this many times at each appointment, but STILL have not gotten the call with the 100% results. When I was being wheeled out by the nurse, I threw up right before getting in my car, and then continued to throw up another painful 10-12 times every single time I moved until about midnight or so. Once we get that call, I'll be posting this online, and will finally tell everyone what is going on. Only family knows about all of this right now. Please be praying that the cancer will be gone in a flash, and I can live my life like it never touched my body. I will blog again the moment I find out the results, which will hopefully be in 20 minutes.

With Love,
     Brittany Mae <3

Day 3

2nd IV

On Friday I had to get a scan of my neck to figure out how to get rid of the lump I've had for over 2 months now, and then I got called in for results on monday. Like I previously posted, this was when I was diagnosed with cancer. They poked me a few times and took 3-4 tubes of blood(to be honest I wasn't looking), and then my husband and I went home. On tuesday morning I was sent for a scan of my chest, and then after lunch I went straight to see a specialist at the Altamonte Cancer Center. He already had the results from that morning in hand, thanks to Aunt Patty making calls, and setting everything up for us. He was kind and very helpful, and happens to be the specialist who saw the strongest woman I've ever known, Lynn Crebs. She passed away due to breast cancer, and I was filled with happiness when I heard I was seeing the same specialist as beautiful Lynn did. The conversation went in circles, and It ended with him sending me right across the street immediately to meet with a surgeon. The surgeon suggested getting me in immediately, and I was set up for an appointment for the following day. Today is the day of my biopsy on my neck, and "busy" can't describe the past 2 days I've had. Leading up to my operation, they will put me under, and I supposedly won't remember a thing.. Hopefully I'm not out too long. I'm nervous as can be, but I know It's all in Gods hands, and that Is more than enough comfort for me. I will be blogging again today If we get the results we were promised.


  With Love,
       Brittany Mae <3

Cancer

I've never completely grasped the idea of cancer until yesterday morning. I was sitting in the doctors office, impatiently waiting in a cold & quiet room, just hoping that my thoughts had led me a-stray. I had been in the lobby with my husband for a painful 20 minutes. Both of us were in silence, because we already both knew separately what it was, but we didn't dare to talk about it or tell one another. When the doctor walked in to give me the results, and asked me to bring my husband back, I knew exactly in that moment what was going on. I was then diagnosed with cancer. God, how do I come up with the strength to handle this? I alone can't be strong enough, so could he have a better plan that I am not aware of? Absolutely. I'm scared out of my mind, but at peace in the same moment. God has plans for me, and no matter what they may be, his plans are beautiful, perfect, and will glorify HIM.. and I'm so blessed that I've been chosen rather than someone else to carry this-- Not burden, but load, hoping I will reach others someday with my story of how God stayed with me in every moment. Please pray for this disease, and that God will give me the strength to over-come it.. but more importantly, PLEASE pray for my husband. My heart cries for him; It cries for his hurt FAR more than my own.

With Love,
     Brittany Mae <3